Do you care? Do you actually care about the kids you are coaching? A few days ago I wrote a post entitled “Are you trying to convince yourself”?

Well here is the ending to the conversation.  When I was at Davenport, I knew what I had, I had a program that was three years old, no kid ever dreamed of going to Davenport, not one kid I coached dreamed of playing a college they never heard of who played their home games on a high school field.

Stanford had all kinds of kids that dreamed of going there, they wanted to win National Championships, they wanted to play on Sunken Diamond, and the school is, well Stanford.  Here is the catch, the coaches there actually care.  These guys genuinely care about their players, it is incredible and truly amazing to see. 

I watched Coach Stotz cry in front of hundreds of people, not because he thought it would help him get players, but because the story of a kid who played for him whose Mom passed away.  He cried, and wasn’t ashamed, because he cares.  Stanford is Stanford, but to truly see a big time program like that have coaches that got it, or at least what I think is getting it.

So I asked you, do you know what you have? I guess the better question is do you have what truly matters; the ability to genuinely care about your players.  I do, Coach Stotz does, Mike Spiegel does.  Also, I knew, I knew I had no way of selling a kid a fantasy about DU, but what I did have is a genuine interest in them.  Them, not the ball player, not the shortstop, who hits third, them.  I cared about what happened to them while they were at school, I cared about what they did in their spare time, and I genuinely cared about what they were going to do after they left the program.  I get phone calls to this day, from kids I coached as long as 8 years ago, why? Because I care and they know that (I also make phone calls, a lot).  I proved that, not by telling them, but by being there, listening, coaching, encouraging, pushing, hugging, helping, using tough love when they needed it, but what matters is they knew I wanted them to succeed in life. 

The first day of practice I told them about who I was and where I had been, then I promptly told them I knew none of them gave a shit about that.  I also told them, I wasn’t here for me, I was here for them.  The last thing I said to them was I did not want their trust until I earned it, I also did not want their respect until I earned it.  I said, we are going to earn each others trust and respect, and because of that we are going to build something that nobody from the outside could ever understand.  This was an actual conversation we had in Left field before our first practice.

I know a few coaches who coach for the social life, to feel important, to get free meals while they recruit, to say I coach College Baseball.  This is sad, because they are coaching to make withdrawals.  These are the worst kinds of coaches, because they take, it is about them, look at me, you should really respect me because I am a Head Coach.  I am right, again these coaches take the energy from the game and the players, they are coaching to make withdrawals.

I also know coaches that care about doing right, that care about the kids, the other coaches, and the families.  My buddy Mike Spiegel is a coach like this.  Mike coaches to make Deposits.  He loves the game, and what the game represents; an opportunity for him to interact and help develop young men.  He is knowledgeable but that wouldn’t matter if he didn’t Care about the players, because they wouldn’t truly listen if they didn’t think he cared.  Mike gives energy, Mike embraces his players, he interacts with them, he truly enjoys coaching, Mike makes deposits.  Mike represents the best kind of coach and if you ask me he should be at a big time school as a big time coach, but that doesn’t matter to him, he just loves to coach (Teach) the kids.  Mike is what a coach should be, he would fit right in at Stanford, with his caring ways and his knowledge.  Mike Makes Deposits.

A list of Coaches that Make Deposits: In no specific order

Ian Hearn, Andy Pascoe, Rob Bolster, Mike Spiegel, Mike Pearson (My little league coach), Tim Frankhouse, Jay Alexander, Ryan Kelley, Mike Diaz, Jeff Nowaczyk, Steve Jaksa (picks up the phone whenever I call), Brett Haring, Jeff Opalewski, Ron Rakowski, Sean Flikke, Coach Stotz, Coach Marquess, Coach Fred Decker, Kelly Clark (high school football coach), Pat McDonald, Bob Youngs, Mark Youngs.

So if you are selling your apparel, your spring trips, your new stadium, who you will play, or any other false sense of worth you have to your recruits, you my friend are sadly missing the point. Also, if the kids you are recruiting care about that, then you my friend are getting the wrong kids (this is for a different post).  You don’t get it, not at all.  I don’t care how many games you win, you don’t get it, if these are your tactics, you are missing the point.

The game is not important, the people are what is important.  The game is simply a tool to reach out to these young men, or women and teach them, guide them, and the best part is every tool or lesson you need can be taught through the game.  Adversity, accomplishment, winning, losing, family, facing failure, bouncing back from failure, being successful, handling that success, caring about people, being part of something that matters, doing your best, hard work, putting others first, pushing yourself, accountability, responsibility, and these are just a few examples of what we can teach through the sports we coach. 

It isn’t about the wins, it isn’t about the rings, the trophies, the trips, THE TITLE: HEAD COACH, recruiting coordinator, hitting coach, pitching coach, LSU, Stanford, it isn’t about any of that crap; it’s about the people, the kids, the other coaches, the families, it is about real life. 

If you remove all the nonsense, from above, you are left with what is important:

*The kids, the memories, and the stories. (Coach Stotz understood this)

this is what it is all about, this is what a ring or a trophy represent.  Think of it like this, if you throw your ring out, or lose your trophy does that mean you never accomplished the things they represent, did you lose the memories, and do the people you accomplished these things with no longer exist? No you still have all of that.

If you remove the people, the kids, the families, will you still have the stories, the memories, or the ring?  NO, if remove what matters you lose the stuff you think matters, but if you remove the stuff you think matters, you still have all the stuff that really matters.

You have to Care, Genuinely, it is the only way.